I simply don’t understand how they do it.

But that’s why I write aboutRHONYinstead of livingRHONY.

Not everyone is cut out for greatness; not everyone can plunge their own feces on national television.

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW YORK CITY

Heidi Gutman/Bravo

And to reiterate: These women haven’t even had dinner yet.

I look good, but I’m sloppy."

I don’t think Ben was stunned by this reveal.

Ramona: She’s not like other girls.

She loves pizza, and her blouses are simply covered in croissant.

I mean, she was doing cabaret before anyone did cabaret."

Luann hisses back: “No, not cabaret caburlesque.”

The cinematography in this episode is, at times, gorgeous.

“SHAME ON YOU!”

she screams at Luann.

“She was with you when you were down and out!”

It’s just go time, and Luann is about to get the full Tinsley treatment.

“You’re drunk,” Dorinda slurs at Luann.

“You drunken fool, you have a mugshot of your drunkenness.”

I gave it to you, keep wearing that s… and you never said thank you."

It is a stunning moment.

And the fact that Luann lets her get away with it thrills Dorinda to no end.

I will see you my 50 closest girlfriends there!