This week, he was exposed as a lying liar who lies in front of everyone, including Michelle!
and was summarily shown the door.
“It’ll be interesting to see if that information ever comes to light.”
Michelle is on the wings of love.ABC
issue was the one filling her head with lies?
Whatever the reason, Jamie is loving the fact that he’s still in the clear.
(Props to Peter for pretending to know who they are.)
The men get their strut on.ABC
Cue the slo-mo flight suit strut!
Oh FFS, guys are your zippers broken?
It’s sweet, and Michelle appreciates it but the other dudes do NOT love it.
Zip! It! Up!.ABC
“What’s frosted tips talking about, man?”
“Come on, Frosty!”
Stop sweating the small stuff, bro.
Will is head over heels.ABC
“I’m already very motion-sensitive,” he frets.
“I’m just trying to keep it composed.”
(See what I did there?)
Will and Michelle.ABC
“Will is absolutely embarrassing Peter,” says Spencer.
And we all know how well Peter handles embarrassment.
Making matters worse, Little Willie gets crowned the winner of the whole shebang.
Two tickets to the gun show, please.ABC
Sorry, I need to interrupt this recap to marvel at the size of Clayton’s biceps.
Dang, and I thoughtRiley was jacked.
Better late than never, I suppose.
Clayton and Michelle.ABC
“I love seeing your personality come out,” coos the Bachelorette.
“I appreciated Clayton bringing a different element to our conversation tonight,” says Michelle.
They end their chat with a smooch.
Men who are over it: A triptych.ABC
Oh God, now Peter and Will are arguing about Peter’s pizza parlors.
“I got three locations!”
“I change lives one slice at a time!”
Mollique is relaxed.ABC
Eventually, Martin and Olu can’t take it anymore, so they get up and walk away.
Sorry, sorry I must interrupt this recap yet again, this time to marvel at Mollique’s arms.
Looks like womendomake passes at men who wear glasses.
Michelle and Martin.ABC
Uh-oh, there’s more trouble in the holding pen.
“So I had to put him in his place.”
Not that that excuses Peter’s behavior.
Will walks off.ABC
“Dude, what did you do with the jacket?”
asks Nayte when Peter returns to the couch.
(Pssst, Peter they’re laughingatyou, notwithyou.)
Will gets his jacket.ABC
“If Michelle finds out about it, it’s going to ruin the date,” sighs Nayte.
Frustrated to the point of tears, Will walks away to cool off.
“I earned that jacket,” he says.
Rodney makes a run for it.ABC
“Not only because it was mine, it was the meaning behind it.
And Peter had to ruin it.”
Hold up, Will you might want to take it down a notch.
Michelle and Rodney.ABC
It was a jacket, not the Shroud of Turin.
Secondly, why don’t you just go fish it out of the pool?
It’ll probably dry fine!
Michelle briefs the men.ABC
“Bro, this man is really pushing my buttons!”
Back in the holding pen, Clayton confronts Peter about what he did.
(I’m paraphrasing.)
Leroy and Chris G.ABC
Oh boy, now Will’s coming back to the holding pen.
You said it, Nayte.
Anyhow, Martin gets the date rose.
We need to see more of Leroy!.ABC
But wait, there’s more!
(I guessBerlinwas busy.)
Meanwhile, Will finally decides to rescue his jacket.
Jamie is in the zone.ABC
Maybe just let it air dry for a few days and it’ll probably be fine.
Okay, Rodney you’re up!
His one-on-one with Michelle begins at night, and it’s pretty low rent: Truth or dare!
More Leroy, please!.ABC
(Guess production went over budget on theTop Gundate?)
“Yo, why you butt naked!”
Olu hollers at Rodney from the balcony.
Brandon with another W!.ABC
“Get some clothes on!”
Somebody yo give Rodney back his shirt, okay?
The man’s suffered enough.
Jamie digs himself deeper.ABC
Michelle brings Rodney back to her room for the “truth” portion of the game.
He admits that his biggest fear in life is passing away before he becomes a husband and father.
Dang, Rodney, you’re only 29!
Don’t let the door hit you, Jamie!.ABC
That’s your cue, Rodney!
“Today, Rodney kept chipping away at that friend zone,” says Michelle.
“She’s truly one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met.
She’s my hero,” he gushes.
“I had to justify my emotions…
I shouldn’t have ever had to justify my feelings.”
Damn right, ma’am.
Rodney commends Michelle for her poise and grace.
“You make it easy for me to trust you,” he says.
And she “apple-lutely” LOVES it.
Rodney gets the date rose.
You go, underdog!
Day dawns on group date number two.
I wonder what Michelle would say?
Inside, a poet namedRudy Franciscois on stage, telling a story about his grandmother.
“I cannot believe it’s Rudy Francisco!”
gushes Chris G. “He’s the poet who got me hooked on spoken word.”
Hey look, the camera is pointed at Leroy!
Quick, before they cut away again!
“I’ve never written a poem before,” says Leroy.
“But being expressive is just being able to be open, vulnerable, while remaining yourself.”
That’s right, you fine gentleman who we’ve barely seen all season!
the crew and the contestants who aren’t on the group date).
I’m sorry, youlostit?
Buddy, there are people watching your every move surely someone saw you put the notebook down somewhere.
What part of “write a poem about your personal feelings” did this guy not understand?
“Jamie didn’t follow the assignment,” grouses Casey.
It was odd."
“Jamie had some weird TED talk that wasn’t to Michelle,” says Brandon wearily.
Dating was hard, she continues, because “white connected with white.”
Give her some snaps, y’all!
“Not only impacted, but strengthened.”
“I’m truly falling in love with this woman,” gushes Brandon.
“There’s not really anybody else worthy of her attention,” he says.
“No one else really matters to me.”
“I saw myself in that story,” he says.
“Those are things I’ve also felt growing up.”
Later in his confessional, Jamie boasts about how Michelle was “captivated” by him during their talk.
As for the group date rose: “I’ve got that in the bag.”
Think again, pal.
That’s right, Brandon gets a second group date rose and Jamie definitely does NOT love it.
Once Michelle leaves, he grabs a producer.
“I’ve got to wait for six weeks to get to the end of this?”
“I really felt like it would be a stronger group of guys.”
Oh boy, rose lovers there are so many things I love about this moment.
Hoo boy, it’s going to be fun watching this idiot get his comeuppance.
The final cocktail party of the week arrives.
Table Guy, a.k.a.
Michelle is understandably concerned: “I feel like I’m now seeing a red flag.”
Not just one, girl.
“My comment to Michelle was that… well, it wasn’t necessarily my comment to Michelle.
[clears throat nervously] Uh… uh… “When did that happen?”
“I feel like nobody in the house was talking about it.”
“Think about it,” he continues.
Excellent question, sir!
Why didn’t he come clean when Michelle brought the issue up last week?
Looks like the Biotech CEO is going down.
And she does NOT love it.
This woman knows what she deserves.
Screw the cocktail party!
Before you go, let me know how you’re feeling about Michelle’s “journey.”
Are you digging Rodney and Leroy as much as I am?
Are you surprised Will got a rose?
And who here hasn’t photocopied their own face at least once in their life?
Post your thoughts below!
