Two winners have their torches snuffed, while another prepares to reenter the tribe.
Plus: updated season rankings!
Today is the day where I update mySurvivorseason rankings.
CBS Entertainment
Its always a daunting task placing a new installment in theSurvivorseason hierarchy.
To this day, I still have players upset at me for where I ranked their season.
Fans never get worked up about it like players do.
KIDDING!!!!
They yell at me all the time!
I dont know why, but they do!
What is wrong with me?!
It says that if I flip the coin and the YEA!
There were so many entertaining people and things about this season.
But if I flip the coin and the NAY!
(Wait, Nick is somehow in the Sarah and Tony fivesome now, but Michele is not?
There was a lot of action this season, but it was also very busy.
On which side will the coin land?
Planting the Sarah Seed
I asked each of the players before the game who they wanted out first.
Theres a reason why Sarah Lacina received the most votes, and we all saw it right here.
Ben and Jeremy had been locked in a bitter feud since…well, I have no idea.
I dont even knowwhythey were feuding.
Or at leastthinkhe was dictating it.
She really does need to be considered part of the group.
(I tried a prototype of this slide puzzle in the challenge office.
They gave me 10 minutes to solve it.
I did not.)
There are a few things worth pointing out about this challenge other than my lameness at puzzles.
(LOOK, I AM NOT A VISUAL LEARNER!!!)
(Narrator: He didnt.)
In the end, Nick won, saving himself in the process.
Ben spoke of having trouble trusting his wife.
Jeremy talked about not believing his fellow firefighters whom he had to trust with his life.
ITS JUST NOT WORTH IT!
Kudos to producers for including it.
All out of butter knives, Michele pulled out her 50-50 advantage after the votes were cast.
You know, sometimes I manage to convince myself I am a halfway decent person.
We all trick ourselves into thinking we are better people than we actually are.
And then reality comes crashing back down.
I was reminded what a P.O.S.
I am when I found myself rooting for Micheles coin flip to come up Not Safe.
Why would I root for someone to be miserable?
Why I would root for bad things to happen to a fellow New Jerseyite?
And heres the even crazier thing: I LIKE MICHELE!
She totally won me over with her openness and honesty inour pre-game chat.
Shes a great person.
And yet I wanted her heart to be crushed on national television.
Why else would I have sat through all five seasons ofTemptation Island?
Anyway, Im a terrible person and I guess that is that.
Interesting game from Jeremy this time.
I say that because, like Kim, we got to see a completely new side to his gameplay.
This time, he had to scratch and claw just to stay alive.
Nick did have the balls!
After telling off Nick, Michele informed us that They havent seen the sassy Michele from Jersey.
Show us the sassy Michele from Jersey!
Show us the Michele who cant decide if she loves Bon Jovi or the Boss more.
at the top of her lungs.
Its one thing to get to the end," she told theGame Changerschamp.
Its another to win it.
You want to win it, right?
And I have no problem with that whatsoever.
Unfortunately for her, Sarah was unmoved.
But Michele had an ace in the hole, and it came from the Edge of Extinction.
The Boomerang Effect
Getting voted out ofSurvivormust suck, no matter how or why it happens.
But some vote-outs are more brutal than others.
Sandra gave Denise an idol she thought she didnt need.
Denise then used it and voted Sandra out.
The whole thing started where all bad things start on the Edge of Extinction.
It is not unreasonable to believe that Ben would have won had Nick not put the disadvantage on him.
Just one problem: Ben was never going to be the target for the group.
Which meant there needed to be a new target.
Can you sense where this is heading?
I feel like Im a genius.
Everything worked out perfectly….
I feel like Im in maybe the best position Ive been in this entire game.
DONT MESS WITH THESURVIVORGODS LIKE THAT, NICK!!!
THE SECOND THOSE WORDS CAME OUT OF YOUR MOUTH, YOU WERE DONE FOR!
And that is a rough way to go.
After the second Tribal Council… the episode was not over!
I dont like the Edge of Extinction.
And I dont like advantages in challenges.
I really like Natalie a lot.
She has my respect as a player, a person, and a crazy beast of an athlete.
The woman had so any tokens she even bought an extra immunity idol for Tyson!
Thats a raw deal.
Worse than that, watching a challenge where someone hasthree advantagesis not very fun.
Its just not good television.
THERE SHOULD NEVER BE ADVANTAGES IN CHALLENGES.
But now it almost assuredly will be Natalie.
And then if Nataliedoeswin, will that seem dramatic or exciting?
But it would have been had she won against an even field.
And that kinda sucks.
A level playing field is not only fairer, but it is more dramatic.
Jesus, Ive been screaming this for a decade now.
Sorry for the broken record act, but its just too bad watching this moment be dramatically neutered.
It wouldnt be the first time.)
I think every player would tell you the same thing.
Even the journey to get rice on the Edge is an ordeal.
Its not a science for sure and Im not saying there arent better versions.
And Now for Something Completely Different…
So, we had our second Tribal Council, and the show did not end.
And then we had people at the Edge preparing for battle, and the show did not end.
Because then something truly weird happened.
Im not sure why this happened.
That would be my guess.
But Im not sure if it really worked.
I actually like a little season recap at the start of the finale.
Will they love the big, brash gameplay of Tony if he makes it to the end?
We know Adam and Jeremy are not big Ben fans, but what about the others?
Michele has not gotten a lot of respect in the game, but everyone is fond of her.
Could her likability earn her a second win?
And Denise made the flashiest move of the season in slaying the Queen while winning multiple individual immunities.
Will that give her the crown?
And then there is whoever returns from the Edge.
This is going to be an epic season.
For season 40, we want a great winner.
Do you know what I mean?
They have bragging rights over everything.
But Natalie is Jeremys best friend in the game.
I do believe that last point plays a big part in it.
Often that is much easier than attempting to put yourself in someone elses situation and imagining that.
They know they arent just voting for another winner ofSurvivor.
They are voting for the winner of winners.
Whoever takes the crown this season could immediately be elevated to the Mt.
Rushmore of contestants alongside folks like Sandra, Parvati, and Rob.
I never understand folks who get angry when you have an opinion that differs from theirs.
I LOVE different opinions.
It is our diversity of opinions that makesSurvivorfandom so fun.
Remember: THERE IS NO RIGHT ANSWER!
Lets be bonded by our love ofSurvivorrather than divided by it.
SURVIVOR SEASON-BY-SEASON RANKINGS
(From best to worst)
1.
(Tie)Survivor: Borneo
(Winner: Richard Hatch)
andSurvivor: Micronesia Fans vs.
Favorites
(Winner: Parvati Shallow)
Ive gone back and forth with these two over the years.
AfterMicronesiaaired, I named it the bestSurvivorseason ever.
So then I returned that to the No.
If I wanted to watch one season again, it would beMicronesia.
If you ask me which is the mostimportantseason, well, obviously itsBorneo.
And the greatness just kept on coming.
Filled with huge memorable moments like Tyson voting himself off, J.T.
giving Russell his immunity idol, and Parvati handing outtwoimmunity idols at one Tribal Council.
I know many people would consider this No.
1, but its all returnees.
For me, the fresh blood ofMicronesiakeeps that season higher.
(Maybe not well at all times, but at least they were playing.)
moment to a truly exhilarating season.
Thats what it all comes down to.
And its not just Christian, who was one of the most universally loved contestants of all-time.
That is an amazing nine out of 20 that I would easily welcome back on another season.
Often, thats all a season needs.
And that really is first and foremost the reasonDavid vs. Goliathbecame an all-time great.
But there were other trophies to hand out as well.
The editing job done by producers was perhaps the shows best ever.
They experimented with new techniques that served to freshen up the franchise in its 37th season.
They added comedic flourishes that were totally unnecessary yet improved the episodes nonetheless.
They cut back and forth between players and stories in ways they never had before.
A top 5 finish.
Letting fans vote in the cast?
Hiding idols at challenges?
I think you all know how I feel about that.
Tempting people to quit an immunity challenge for a mystery vote steal advantage?
All the tribe switcheroos?
They played out to perfection.
TheSurvivorproducers always throw a bunch of twists out there.
Usually, some work and some dont.
This season, they all paid dividends.
I also appreciated how hard the bulk of the cast was playing.
Usually, you get a small handful of big-time gamers.
Another plus: The votes were completely unpredictable from week to week, leading to some truly crazy Tribals.
Sure, the challenges were a bit blah, but still, a rousing and triumphant success.
Some people hate on Jenna as a winner, but she won challenges and played an effective social game.
Survivor: Pearl Islands
Rupert stealing shoes.
Fairplay getting drunk at Tribal Council.
Osten sucking at everything.
It was all delicious.
Loses points, though, for the awful Outcasts twist, which also led to a disappointing final two.
And the challenges may have beenSurvivors best ever.
Survivor: Winners at War
(Winner: ?
Im going to start with some of the issues.
The main problem with the Edge of Extinction is not that.
Because the players and personalities themselves were A+++.
I know a lot of fans were bummed to see all the old-schoolers go early.
As an old-schooler myself, so was I.
But PEOPLE!!!!
Sarah, Tony, and Jeremy are three of the best players this game has ever seen!
And Denise gave us an all-time epic move and will now forever be known as the Queenslayer.
How could you not be invested in watching these folks do battle?
Go back and watch it.
Its amazing on both a technical and an emotional level.
And Tony Vlachos cemented his reputation as the most entertaining player of all time.
WhenMillennials vs. Gen Xstarted, most of us were like, Yeah, its fine.
Not amazing, but not terrible either.
But then things kept happening.
And everyone kept flipping on one another.
And everyone kept getting blindsided.
And everyone kept futilely using their idols for other people.
It was madness and chaos in the best way possible.
And what was so fascinating was that (with the exception of Michaela) nobody took their ouster personally.
This was a season remarkably free of any sort of fighting whatsoever.
None of the ugliness ofWorlds ApartorKaoh Rongpermeated the proceedings, even amongst all the lying and backstabbing.
Even Hannah was entertaining with her neurosis.
Even Ken was entertaining with his late-game cluelessness.
Bret gave us a touching moment where he came out as gay to Zeke.
Sunday outsmarted Adam and Hannah with a ruse at Tribal Council.
(However, I still cant figure out why they went with three-person duels a.k.a.
truels and they definitely should have stopped RI at the merge.)
So why is it so high?
Because the casting and storylines that developed gave us people to root for and against something every greatSurvivorseason needs.
Survivor: Caramoan Fans vs.
But hear me out first before you Russell any feathers.
It was flat-out grating.
But everything post-merge was spectacular.
There were moves and countermoves galore down the homestretch.
Also, dont overlook how great the bevy of water challenges was.
Should I push it down in the rankings due to the lackluster reunion show that followed?
He was denied in the end, though, in the most controversial jury decision ever.
Survivor: China
(Winner: Todd Herzog)
Ive always loved this season.
It featured a really good cast stuck in a really bad location.
Todd completely owned that final Tribal Council.
Thats how you win a million dollars.
Plus: Purple rock!!!
Survivor: Cook Islands
(Winner: Yul Kwon)
What a difference a mutiny makes.
It was listless until that fateful moment when Candice and Penner stepped off the mat.
Then we finally had underdogs to root for.
Plus, just look at all the great first-time contestants (Parvati, Penner, Ozzy, Yul).
Survivor: Ghost Island
(Winner: Wendell Holland)
This was such a hard season to rank.
(Guess the Bamboo was about as riveting as watching an Adam Sandler movie as part of aSouth Pacificreward.
And then there is the ending, which also has plusses and minuses.
So again, both good and bad.
Like I said, a hard season to rank.
But the ending was fantastic, and I was engaged throughout, even with the noted weaknesses.
I liked watching Kelly act like a super-spaz.
I was fascinated with the Laurel and Donathan strategic push-and-pull.
Throw that all together and you end up in the middle of the pack.
Survivor: Game Changers
(Winner: Sarah Lacina)
What a weird season this was.
We were treated to two titans of the game (Tony and Sandra) going toe to toe.
But something was missing.
Said events were all exciting, but they failed to form a cohesive unit.
all gone before the merge.
And despite the gameplay and unpredictability down the stretch, that is kind of what happened.
And then there is what happened to Cirie in the finale.
(The fact that it happened to a true legend in Cirie made it even harder to swallow.)
Thats a great example of natural show evolution that worked and the producers deserve to be commended for it.
But there is one thing I reallydiddig about this season, and that is the cast.
Survivor: Tocantins
(Winner: J.T.
Thomas)
Okay, you may roll your eyes at Coach 1.0.
But imagine for a second this season without him.
His unintentional comedy single-handedly lifts this into respectable territory for me.
Seriously, other than Tyson getting blindsided, were there any memorable moments that didnt involve the Dragonslayer?
But the unlikely alliance between bookish northerner Fishbach and country boy J.T.
made for a compelling thread throughout the season.
Survivor: Australian Outback
(Winner: Tina Wesson)
An overrated season in my book.
Pretty predictable boot order as well.
Dude did burn his hands off, though.
And, outside of one mind-bogglingly boring loved ones reward contest, the challenges were strong.
But now comes the bad news.
Like the majority ofSurvivornation, I was not a fan of the new final four fire-making twist.
That was a bummer.
Working against this season is the fact that there simply were not enough transcendent players in the cast.
(Remember Jerri getting literally booed off the stage?)
Terry was robbed on a final challenge that may or may not have been completely fair.
Another unmemorable final two.
Shane Powers should have been brought back forHeroes vs. Villains.
And theSecond Chanceseason, for that matter.
The fact that so many unworthy players went so far is simply too damning.
Survivor: Worlds Apart
(Winner: Mike Holloway)
30.
Survivor: Edge of Extinction
(Winner: Chris Underwood)
Flat.
Thats the best word I can think of to describe the season.
Survivor: Africa
(Winner: Ethan Zohn)
Some great challenges.
Not that much else was great.
Survivor: Guatemala
(Winner: Danni Boatwright)
One of the more unlikeable casts so far.
Stephenies evil twin?)
Rafe was good for a few laughs, though.
Especially on rope obstacles.
That counts for something.
Survivor: One World
(Winner: Kim Spradlin)
Look, I have total respect for Kims game.
Like Tom inPalauand Rob inRedemption Island, she excelled strategically, socially, and physically.
Unfortunately, that is really the only good thing I can say about this season.
And thats too bad because I do think the One World concept was a solid one.
But, man, what a thoroughly uninspiring cast.
Speaking of awful creative decisions…
39.
Survivor: Nicaragua
(Winner: Jud Fabio Birza)
Its way down here for a few reasons.
- Splitting the tribes up by age and the Medallion of Power were both enormous flops.
LikeOne World,Thailand,andFiji,Nicaraguahad just too many unlikable players.
Two people quitting with only 11 days left.
No big memorable moments.
EvenThailandhad the fake merge andFijihad the big Yau-Man/Dreamz free car deal gone bad, but what wasNicaraguas signature moment?
Unfortunately, it was people quitting, and that was memorable for all the wrong reasons.
But even I recognize that when it comes to rankingSurvivorseasons, it ultimately comes down to a feeling.
But nothing seemed fun in light of the far more serious issue that clearly outweighed the final game result.
Quite simply: It made the rest of the season impossible to enjoy.
And so here it sits.
And there you have it Survivorseason rankings sure to inflame and annoy.
Where does Winners at War fall for you in the rankings?
Whom are you rooting for to win?
Can anyone beat Natalie in the battle back challenge?
And can anyone from the Edge actually win the game?
