We’re going to make some jokes, then put ‘em all aside.
“Lupita Nyong’obeingall of us.
(This one being thoroughly “WTF?")
ABC
White people are really loving this moment.”
What was the joke?
And at whose expense was it?
Chris Rock at the 2022 Oscars.ROBYN BECK/AFP via Getty Images
It all became too much for me.
On my gayest and whitest text chain, we had been following the ceremony closely.
We loved the hosts, were divided over Chalamet’sred carpet attire, cried overLizaandAriana DeBose.
Sidney Poitier and his historic Oscar for his work in ‘Lilies of the Field’ in 1964.Bettmann/Getty Images
“What a weak-minded man.”
It pushed me over the edge.
She saw something admirable in that…and I doubt she was the only one.
Questlove wins Best Documentary at the 2022 Oscars.Neilson Barnard/Getty Images
Back on the chain I texted: “I can’t really judge him.”
One of my friends responded: “I am judging the s— out of it.”
Which is, without context, funny.
With all that, a slap in the face is a bridge too far?
But I’m a Black man in America, I don’t exist without context.
Sure, some found Will slapping Chris funny it was certainly funnier than thatG.I.
Janejoke, which wouldn’t have been fresh when that movie came out 25 years ago.
But more than anything, I was embarrassed.
Because it had to happen in front of all these damn white people.
(I mean, is there a whiter person than Nicole Kidman?)
How they see us.
Will Smith is thefifthBlack man to win Best Actor in the Oscar’s 94 years.
The first Black man,Sidney Poitier, kicked off the In Memoriam segment.
It was like a passing of the torch.
This should’ve been a triumphant night for him and by extension, for Black people.
The sad truth is: When one of us wins, it’s just one of us winning.
But when one of us stumbles, we all stumble.
That’s the burden of being a Black icon.
You shoulder the expectations, grand or otherwise, of your entire race.
Poitier understood that all too well, and so does Will Smith.
Yet, there were the headlines about Smith, seemingly remorseless whilstgetting jiggy wit’ itat Oscar after parties.
I vowed long ago to avoid anything in the news where a Black person is harmed.
I had grown up with both Chris Rock and Will Smith.
I was used to laughing at him and at Chris Rock.
Sometimes it’s easier to laugh because the alternative is so much worse and heartbreaking.
And it was marred by one Black icon slapping another.
And it was marred by one Black icon slapping another.
I just can’t find the humor in it anymore.
