Here it is, PopWatchers!
On the count of three, lets unmute our televisions and let the mockery begin!
Mandi:Jennifer Love Hewitt says theGhost Whispererset is haunted.
One of the spirits must have given her a spray tan when she was sleeping in her trailer.
Slezak:Dana Delany is going to drink after the Emmys.
Which means its okay for me to have some wine right now, yes?
Chad:Im waaay ahead of you.
Slezak:I just heard Cynthia Nixon use the phrase rediscover the joy in her life.
I dont care for that.
Mandi:Patrick Dempsey just used the phrase right on.
Slezak:January Jones gown looks like its from the Victorias Secret Angels collection.
That makes me think of the British ladys voice saying the most advanced bra and panty evah!
Mandi:Ricky Gervais has been with his girlfriend for 25 years.
Proof he hasnt gone Hollywood.
Mandi:He has the best laugh ever.
Slezak:This whole bit with theEntouragedudes couldve been from three years ago, no?
Mandi:Giuliana: Your body, Nicollette [Sheridan], is rockin.
Nicolette credits her golden retriever, who likes to run, with giving her her figure.
I knew I needed a dog.
Mandi:Teri Hatcher just squealed when she saw Steve Carell on the red carpet.
Still dont love her.
Slezak:Lisa Edelstein looks fabulous, and shes taken control of the Hatcher interview from Giuliana.
Mandi:First commercial break.
A good time to catch up on what we missed in the first hour.
Josh Groban is doing some crazy singing number, with Muppets.
Slezak:Tim Gunn says Giuliana looks stunning!
His voice upgrades every adjective.
Slezak:Um, Ryan just referred to Eva Longoria-Parkers hubby as TP.
That is unbelievable… she had to walk!
Slezak:Nope, now she says she took a golf cart.
Chad:Ryan said Eva and TP started pouring concrete 10 years ago.
Is that some sort of metaphor?
Slezak:Was that a subtle way of asking if shes pregnant?
I seriously have no idea.
Mandi:DAVID BOREANAZ!!!
Slezak:Mandi, breathe deeply and slowly.
Mandi:I knew he would have great socks on.
Did Giuliana just ask him if he was wearing matching socks?
And did Jeremy Piven just diss my David Boreanaz!?!?!
Slezak:That is a hot-ass sock on Boreanaz!
Probably one sock costs more than my entire outfit.
Meeta:Im ready to declare it right now David Boreanaz is best-dressed sock of the night.
Take that, Pivs!
Slezak:Julia Louis-Dreyfus looks a-mah-zing!
Her dress looks like it couldve been made with the seatbelts from theProject Runwaychallenge a few weeks ago.
Mandi:Im not normally one for coral, but she does look stunning…and young.
Slezak:I like her thatsgood after getting a cheek kiss from Ryan.
Chad:OMG its Joanie fromMad Men!
Her D cups runneth over.
Luv me some Joanie.
Slezak:Why is Sarah Paulson with Felicity Huffman?
Did I miss an Ausiello scoop?
Mandi:Why is Rachel Griffiths wearing brown?
(Sorry, that was the gayest sentence I ever wrote.)
Chad:The gay bar was raised with this is ruching, people!
Slezak:Yes, I am challenging Jay Manuel to a gay-off when this is all done.
Slezak:Oh L. YEAH, Mandi!L.
Im hoping this is a trend that will continue.
So, Meeta, you pretty much underlined and bolded that statement.
I think it was his hair.
Meeta:I see Lee Pace and I think pie.
Meeta:Or peach-blueberry pie.
Meeta:Is it okay to have pie for Emmy dinner?
Also, why is Lee Pace admitting to Giuliana that he has a speech prepared?Pobrerookie.
Mandi:Hes genuinely nervous, so Ill allow it.
Chad:Poor Ryan.
Couldnt the producers give him a phone book to stand on?
Jordin Sparks towered over him, Conan OBrien makes him look pocket-sized.
Chad:Hes gonna have a nasty crick in his neck by the time this is over.
Meeta:Why is nobodys hair red anymore?
Cynthia Nixon, Conan OBrien…Did they ban red dye #2 in Hollywood?
Mandi:Jean Smart looks stunning.
Chad:Is anyone else pissed thatEntertainment Weeklyis the only magazine that wasnt adapted for aDexterad?
Chad:I cant believe Im typing this, but Mary Steenburgen looks hot.
Slezak:And now he made a joke about Bea Arthurs size.
He deserves to be sent to comedy jail…4EVA!
Mandi:Christian Siriano wouldve made Ryan look tall.
Chad:And butch.
Mandi:Holly Hunter just called the Emmys fun as hell.
I think she scared Ryan.
Mandi:Im guessing her purple dress scared Meeta??
Meeta:You know me so well!
Im just trying to think happy Vanessa (L. Yeah) Williams thoughts!
Slezak:Meeta, what do you think of Vanessa L. Yeahs divine gorgeous dress?
(And incidentally, Annie Barrett is taunting us in the message boards.
I send her a Kelly-style Oh.)
Meeta:Love Vanessa L. Yeahs gown.
She took basically every risk in the book asymmetrical, printed, shading and she totally pulls it off.
Slezak:Is that commercial forSunset Tana parody?
Or does that show actually exist?
Mandi:I love Rita Wilson, but E!s Glam Cam does not.
Meeta:Did Tom Hanks come back from the future to visit the 2008 Emmys?
Slezak:Why will they only show Bryan Cranston in a postage-stamp-sized box?
He is NOT earning his paycheck!!
How can any red carpet commenter worth their concealer not know that Julia L-D only ever wears Narciso Rodriguez.
Usually its black and white, but its always Narciso.
Slezak:I love feelings of rage while watching Emmys and Emmys red carpet!
Meeta:Can we take a moment for Christina Applegate?
Mandi:Me, too.
I watch that show.
And not just for Barry Watson.
Mandi:That time we spent in offices across the hall from each other comes back to bite me!
Slezak:Hey, dont knock QVC.
Its a lot more entertaining thanWhat About Brian!
Especially when he knows there are 3 1/2 hours of Emmy live-blogging to come.
Mandi(shrinking): There is no Exhibit B….Didnt want to leave you hanging.
Slezak:And on that note, on to the Emmys telecast!
Read our Emmys live-blog.
