The Community multiverse fractures as Evil Abed escapes the darkest timeline.
Living in the brightest timeline?
Us, for watching this genius finale.
The philosopher Steve Martin once said, Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
Basically, that its almost an impossible task to fully translate the brilliance of one art form into another.
Well, at this point I feel the same when it comes to writing aboutCommunity.
It seems a fools errand even to try.
However, as some of you predicted you will get not seven, but twenty-one Lines of the Night.
Count em, baby!
Because they werethatfrickin good.
Thatwouldbe true if there werent such vivid characters upon whom to hang those pop culture references.
But luckily for us, there are.
to Gillian Jacobs for participating in ourCommunitylive chat during the finale last night.
Theres almost a safety-valve catharsis involved.
Hence Annies brilliant These things happen in videogames.
We cant get hung up on conventional morality.
We need to survive and win!
Shirleys churchy morality and Annies Hello, Kitty!
charm gave way to a paranoid, Nixonian cover-up sensibility.
There really are two types of gamers in the world: walkers and jumpers.
Personally, like Troy, I fall into the latter.
Why would you want to walk anywhere when you canjumpyour way there?
But, hey, you dont build a civilization without breaking a few backs.
NEXT: The best lines of Digital Estate Planning and a rundown of The First Chang Dynasty.
In short, Digital Estate Planning was a heartbreaking work of staggering genius.
But there can only be seven lines from it that make our list.
And they are:
7.
I didnt bring my likeness!
-Troy
- you could leave notes.
This game is incredible.
I wish my mom were here.
She always said my videogame knowledge would come in handy.
I never believed her!
Incidentally, my mom has said pretty much the same thing to me.
We dont hack and slash our way through life because wereonewith life.
Hes shooting lightning and Im naked!
People have said similar things about me.
-Abed, when told that Hilda is just a program.
Troy and Abed shooting lava!
-Trobed
Digital Estate Planning was almost like a Terrence & Philip-style deviation from the finale-arc proper.
Last week, when we left our heroes, they had discovered the full extent of Changs villainy.
He had replaced Dean Pelton with Fake Moby, a.k.a.
Or Deanel-Ganger, if you prefer.
Andthey did so like anOceans 11-style heist movie.
Thats probably the only vaguely humorous insight hes contributed in his sorry career.
Or, in the case of the Greendale Seven, Im in!
So many great moments here, where to begin?
Chang playing a nine-minute keytar solo.
Troy and Abed sporting mustaches and a Noo Yawk honk.
Britta seducing one of the Changlourious Basterds over the Internet, in what might be a felony offense.
Britta as his Goth baby-doll assistant.
That little girls birthday song to Chang about how he eats the sun and drinks the sky.
The moment of requited love for the Dean when Jeff finally touched him back.
I could go on…but here are the seven best lines from The First Chang Dynasty.
Love is not admissible evidence.
Theyre like telephones for your eyes.
Chang, youre insane.
Youre still into keytar?
Its like Stalin back in Russia times.
It looks like J-Swag is going deep dish.
I just want to reiterate this should be the only time you seduce a child over the internet.
-Jeff, to Britta
1.
Vice Dean Laybourne had finally won.
As a native Floridian, Ive had to interact closely with surly air-conditioning repairmen my whole life.
I can assure you that the depiction of their uniquely insular, alien subculture here was pretty darn accurate.
In a stunning twist, Troy found himself in the middle of a coup.
Laybourne died in a freak Freon-valve accident.
It was a rookie mistake, and Troy knew it.
Laybournes replacement had obviously engineered his death to seize power for himself.
The two of them would duel by standing in two separate climate-controlled chambers.
Each one would get steadily warmer until he had repaired the air conditioner inside.
The loser would be whoever yielded first…or died.
As their Messiah, Troy won the battle handily.
Then, like a real hero, he walked away.
Truly, he is the Kwisatz Haderach!
Who better to play this legal swine than Rob Corddry?
Little did Jeff know, though, how close he was to losing his right arm.
Evil Abed had found a way to cross over from the darkest timeline to our own.
I assume he just Quantum Leaped into Abed Primes body, right?
Im telling you, things got dark!
Hed have to cut off Jeffs arm while the lawyer was in court.
He and his felt goatee vanished.
Did someone say Sexy construction worker?
Can youhonestlytell me thats a saner decision?
-Evil Abed when Lame Abed tells him hes reading the novelization ofThe Chronicles of Riddick.
You already know the rules…because therearentany!
-Sun Chamber hype man.
Ill change my major just one more time.
Youre going to get diagnosed by someone who says her favorite superhero is X-Man?
-Evil Abed to Lame Abed
2.
I come from the darkest timeline.
You may call it the Britta of timelines because everything is the worst.
#SixSeasonsAndAMovie -the grassroots hashtag ofCommunityfans everywhere that was included in the closing credits last night.
The final montage set toCommunitys theme song felt like a true ending of sorts.
If, you know,Communityactuallyhadbeen cancelled.
Yes, The Drug Dealer Formerly Known as Alex faked his death in that meth explosion, after all.
How cool, cool, cool isthat?
See you in the fall, everyone!
